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You are what you eat: What your Halloween candy says about you

Different occasions call for celebrations and celebrations call for a feast, but when it comes to Halloween, there’s only one treat we all love to indulge in — candies! Regular treats, however, are a tad bit overrated and when even the normally loved Tootsie Rolls makes it to the most hated Halloween candy list, you know it’s time for a change…just like what you do to become a better (or worse) version of yourself.

Because it’s Halloween, let’s steer away from the rainbow-sprinkled sweet path and take instead the macabre route to (re)discovering your persona. And because it’s Halloween, there’s no better way to tell you who you are than by your favorite candy bars.

This is what happens when you have nothing else but candy corns and Cowtales (and Tootsie Rolls!) in your house.

“Normal” is a taboo word in the Halloween dictionary, and because we’re going with the popular belief that you are defined by your diet, we won’t just go with the regular gummy bears and jelly beans (or Tootsie Rolls for that matter).

We, however, have to warn you that some of the stuff you’re going to read are not for the faint of heart. Although there’s nothing we can do if the most stomach-churning of them all nailed your character, you can still save yourself by choosing which ones to dole out to your dear trick-or-treaters. Let us remind you that Halloween hath no fury like a dissatisfied bunch of neighborhood kids — we don’t want to be responsible for the “uncool” reputation you’ll reap or the teepeeing and egging your house might get.

Excited to find out what does your candy says about your Halloween self? Take your pick and we’ll give you the answers!

Frankenstein’s progeny


Pop-ular Science Halloween Lollipops from Dylan’s Candy Bar
International shipping weight – 0.5 kg

Your inner mad scientist is dying to come out! Get out of your precious lab and take a break to satisfy your sugar cravings with these freaky body parts before you get mad for real. But if you feel a little softy, the strawberry and cream-flavored lab rats will feed your sweet, chewy side.


Gummy Mice (5 lbs) from Candy Nation
International shipping weight – 2.5 kg

Sweet-toothed insectivore


Cricket Lick-it Suckers Box from Hotlix
International shipping weight – 1.5 kg

If you’re like Willy Wonka but loves a taxidermy lab more than your chocolate factory, you will relish these candy-coated creepy crawlers. In case you’re wondering, the crickets and scorpions are real, but they were cleaned, dried, and cooked to crunchy goodness before getting coated in an assortment of fruity syrup to satisfy your cravings for sweet goodies with an arthropodic twist.


Scorpion Suckers Box from Hotlix
International shipping weight – 1.5 kg

Keyboard warrior

Witch’s Finger Grape Flavored Lollipop (pack of 2) from Greenbrier
International shipping weight – 0.5 kg

Are you a master gamer, a runner for the world record of fastest texter, or a keyboard destroyer? Whatever you do, you can continue doing it while snacking on these grape-flavored suckers. They may look unsavory at first but the crooked, bony fingers complete with red, crusty nails are actually finger-licking good!

The thinking man


Gummy Brains from
International shipping weight – 0.5 kg

If you think that this is your spirit candy, you are either a great thinker or an undiscovered zombie with a taste for sweet, chewy cerebrum. These cluster of neurons are also anatomically correct, so you can choose whether you want to feed your left brain or right brain or both regions in your quest to become ambidextrous.

Dracula’s descendant


Candy Blood Bags from O’Ryans Village
International shipping weight – 0.5 kg

For our sweet-fanged friends! If you’re one of them, make sure to stock up on this strawberry-flavored liquid. WARNING: Do not take this intravenously!



Bloody Skulls Candy (5lbs) from The Nutty Fruit House
International shipping weight – 2.5 kg

Do you happen to love a deadly surprise? If you do, then these sugary tart candies should be your favorite Halloween snack! Share these with your friends or the trick-or-treaters and make sure to give extra to the kid in a Jolly Roger pirate hat.

Spooky couch potato


Spooky Eyes Gluten Free Bubble Gum from Black Tie Mercantile
International shipping weight – 1 kg

Take a little Halloween break from your favorite television shows and spook the living daylights out of your friends or the kids in the neighborhood with these realistic, bloodshot eye gumballs. Encased in a sophisticated-looking black tie box, no one will suspect what’s inside — just don’t let them take a peek!

Snake charmer


Giant Gummy Party Python from It’s Sugar
International shipping weight – 13.5 kg

We don’t know what kind of mold was used to make this gigantic treat but kudos to whoever made it because they seriously got everything down to the scaly details! Bring this 8-foot long python to the party and you’ll surely get the attention of your reptile-loving friends.


Enjoy your Halloween feast!







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